There are questions that will be answered at this weekend’s UFC 154 pay per view event. Some are minor, such as how GSP will react to such a long layoff, whether Anderson Silva will get in the cage to challenge GSP, and who between Johny Hendricks and Martin Kampmann will move into position for the next welterweight title shot.
Some questions, on the other hand, are much more important, such as whether Arianny will wear red or black on fight night, and who “Filthy” Tom Lawlor will impersonate at the weigh-ins. Because there is a zero percent chance I will ever be close enough to Arianny to get her thoughts on the red-black conundrum, I will focus instead on Tom Lawlor.
For those of you who hate entertainment and are unaware, Lawlor has made a history of hilariously impersonating an important figure in MMA history while weighing-in for his recent UFC fights. His inspirations have included such notable “legends” as “One-Glove” Art Jimmerson, Dan “The Beast” Severn, Harold Howard, the “Just Bleed” guy, and, most recently, Genki Sudo. The impersonations are great as much because of the thought and dedication displayed by Lawlor as because they are a hat tip to all of us nerds who have liked MMA since before it was cool.
So all of this got me thinking about who Lawlor will impersonate before weighing in for his UFC 154 bout against Francis Carmont. Here are three suggestions I was able to come up with, in no particular order:
1. Kimo: Kimo made an instant impression in his debut at UFC 3. Not only was he the first competitor to give the dominant Royce Gracie a legitimate run for his money, but he also entered the octagon carrying a Jesus-size cross on his back. Kimo would go on to have an up and (mostly) down career in the cage, before retiring and not dying. And while carrying a giant cross to the weigh in may not be politically correct (or even feasible), Kimo has enough tattoos to make the impersonation otherwise feasible.
2. Keith Hackney: Like Kimo, Hackney also made his debut at UFC 3, earning a moniker as a giant killer for defeating 700-pound sumo wrestler Emmanuel Yarborough in the tournament’s first round. More memorably, and more importantly for Lawlor’s costume, however, was Hackney’s return at UFC 4, where he epically destroyed the testicles of opponent Joe Son, eventually winning by tap-out due to groin strikes, which was somehow legal. I can picture Lawlor now with mullet wig, wife beater, and sweat pants coming on stage and tanking everyone in sight before getting on the scale.
3. Minowaman: Speaking of giant-killers, none have killed more than Ikuhisha Minowa, who has been put up against every tall and fat guy that Japanese MMA promoters have been able to uncover. This one would be easy for Lawlor, too, as all it would take is some nicely placed hair, knee pads, and pro-wrestling tights. While it would not be the production that the other two on this list could become, we would at least get to see Lawlor in wrestling tights again, wrestling tights on MMA fighters are almost always a sure laugh, and it would be another great nod to Japanese MMA.